The End is COMING!

haha

New Year's Eve

today...

this year has gone fast.  really fast.  I kind of wish it went slower.  I mean, in just short of 12 more hours, 2008 is gone forever.  That's kind of cool to think about though.  

What do you guys think?

My Eyes Adored You

"My eyes adored you
Though I never laid a hand on you,
My eyes adored you
Like a million miles away from me you couldn't see
How I adored you:
So close, so close and yet so far away

Carried your books from school,
Playing make-believe you're married to me:
You were fifth grade, I was sixth
When we came to be
Walking home every day over Barnegat Bridge and Bay,
Till we grew into the me and you
Who went our separate ways

My eyes adored you
Though I never laid a hand on you,
My eyes adored you
Like a million miles away from me you couldn't see
How I adored you:
So close, so close and yet so far

Headed for city lights,
Climbed the ladder up to fortune and fame,
I worked my fingers to the bone,
Made myself a name.
Funny, I seem to find that, no matter how the years unwind,
Still I reminisce about the girI miss
And the love I left behind...

My eyes adored you
Though I never laid a hand on you,
My eyes adored you
Like a million miles away from me you couldn't see
How I adored you:
So close, so close and yet so far

All my life I will remember how warm and tender
We were way back then
Though I'm feeling sad regrets I know I won't ever forget
You, my childhood friend

My eyes adored you
Though I never laid a hand on you,
My eyes adored you
Like a million miles away from me you couldn't see
How I adored you:
So close, so close and yet so far"

-the Four Seasons

David!

Okay, most of you- well, maybe not most of you but alot of the people David tells his theories to- have heard David talk about this concept of "girl porn" and how chick flicks are unhealthy for girls and in a way can almost be compared to pornography because of the false images of romance they portray.  And no one ever believes David (well, except for me).  

But look!  Proof!!!!  AH-HA!

According to relationship experts at Heriot Watt University in Edinburgh, romantic comedies give people unrealistic ideas about love and sex, and cause them to "fail to communicate with their partner." Here's more:

Psychologists at the family and personal relationships laboratory at the university studied 40 top box office hits between 1995 and 2005, and identified common themes which they believed were unrealistic.

The university's Dr Bjarne Holmes said: "Marriage counselors often see couples who believe that sex should always be perfect, and if someone is meant to be with you then they will know what you want without you needing to communicate it. We now have some emerging evidence that suggests popular media play a role in perpetuating these ideas in people's minds. The problem is that while most of us know that the idea of a perfect relationship is unrealistic, some of us are still more influenced by media portrayals than we realize."

Do you think this is true? Is real-life romance a big ol' letdown? Sure, lots of people like the idea of a perfect man or "happily ever after," but does that mean we're all unable to separate fantasy from reality?

Christmas! Christmas! Christmas!

It's almost Christmas!  It doesn't really feel like it alot it seems, but this December has had its moments.  Like right now!  At the WNT white elephant, I got this little Christmas tree (which I had totally been wanting, it's so great!), and so I've been in my room wrapping presents and putting up pint-sized ornaments and singing Happiness, and now outside all the lights are on and it's snowy...I love it!  

Jesus is coming!  The Messiah is coming!  I mean, it's like...  Dude, you guys!   It's really just the anniversary of it, since the opportunity is ALWAYS there, but...  Redemption.  It's here!  

Salvation is here!!!  

Hello, air

I doubt anyone will ever read this.  Gosh, that's become like a battle cry....  But this time I don't really care.  It's just a fact of life...

I want to continue that sentence:

it's just a fact of life... that I'm sinking into mediocrity.  

But that's not what it is.  

There's this one song that goes 

"we were meant to live for so much more/

but we lost ourselves/

somewhere we live inside..."

People settle for less way too often.  

But other times, people get disappointed when the best doesn't come.

Maybe it's that people expect too much from other people.  We're all just human, and we're not the larger-than-life, idealized One who you've been waiting for to come around and sweep you off your feet!  

But once people have disappointed us so often, we get used to it, and stop even asking for anything more.  Because while other people won't (can't) give us anything more than they are capable, God is capable of More.  And He so wants to give it to us!  But we just sit there looking at the people across the room from us and waiting for them to cross that room and fulfill our dreams, when the Only One who really can is just in the other direction.

Once I remember crying out to Jesus, "have You ever felt this?" 

But He has.  

Just picture Him, standing there, with His arms out, and He's standing there saying,

"Look, McKenzie!  It's Me!" but He has tears running down His face because I rejected Him.  So many times I turn my back and run off to another party, waiting for just another "friend" to- I don't even know what I'm waiting for.  But Jesus does, and He's the only one who can provide it, and I have abandoned Him in search for it.  

Good

Night

God

Bless

Kenzer 

Lou

A slight random peek into my mind...that probably doesn't make much sense, but whatevs

Reading my lines for 'night, Mother is kind of strange sometimes.  Well, it's just... Jessie's relationship with Cecil is so universal.  That sounds really dumb.  But... she's like,

"He wasn't the wrong man.  I loved him so much.  And I tried [so hard to work with him, to be with him].

But he always knew I was trying, so it didn't work."

That's so sad!  It's tragic. 

Then in theater I'm doing this scene from "On Golden Pond" with Matt Legeal.  

He is my aging (slightly senile, very funny) father, and I am his slightly estranged daughter, attempting to restore our fractured relationship. 

I'm working so hard to initiate a conversation about "us," to fix how we relate.  

And he sits there being uncomfortable, avoiding the subject, and making jokes.  

I'm the one pursuing the conversation, despite the awkward topic.  I just think it's interesting.

But I kind of like it. 

LIFT tomorrow, possibly in Ms. Quinlan's room.  It's the last meeting of the year!  I'm bringing Christmas wreaths, you know, the edible kind.  Come if you want!

Love 

y'all

God

Bless

Kenzer 

Lou